Christine Hodge is a good friend of mine who wittingly writes of motherhood woes and joys. She has willingly accepted my offer to be a guest on my blog ... but soon enough I know she will be blogging on her own!
The other night I was talking with a friend of mine who has a daughter who just turned one year old. That day my friend had come to a rather sobering realization that just about everything she accomplishes today will most likely have to be done again tomorrow (the dishes, putting away toys, straightening up the house, the list goes on). She also was saddened (actually a little angry) that she does all of these things over and over every day without a "thank you" from her daughter (and often her husband). Of course, she knows that her little girl can't verbally express her gratitude toward her mommy, but sadly she also knows that her daughter most likely wouldn't say "thanks" even if she could.
As moms, we've all been there--or will be there at some point. We've felt over-worked and under-appreciated and all we want is a little pat on the back (okay, a BIG pat on the back, or a back massage). We also want to do something that will last for more than 24 hours. When I get my car washed and vacuumed, I often tell my family to be careful in the car for at least a few days. "I'd like to see something stay clean for more than a few hours," I tell them. So I got to thinking about what my friend said and I had a revelation of my own. There are things that we, as moms, do everyday that we won't have to do again tomorrow. There are things that we can do today that will last forever. And I'm not talking about making scrapbooks!
Every day we have the opportunity to positively impact another person's life. Not the grocery store clerk or your child's preschool teacher, but your child--that little one God has entrusted into your care. The time that we spend with our children will last more than 24 hours, and much of what we teach them today won't have to be repeated again tomorrow (unless they're learning to tie their shoes). That should give us a little bit of that sense of accomplishment that we crave so much.
When I first realized that I had the awesome responsibility of instructing my little girls, I have to admit I was worried. I thought that meant that I had to help them memorize a scripture verse every day and have them reading articles out of the Reader's Digest by age 5 (yes, my mother-in-law said her firstborn did just that!) But having the responsibility of teaching my children does not mean I have to sit them down every day with a lesson to learn. It just means that I sprinkle a little bit of the Bible onto their cereal as I mention that God made the cows that give us milk. It means that I mix a little bit of Maturity into their playtime when I encourage my daughters to share. It means that I add a little bit of Prayer to our walks when my toddler scrapes her knee and I ask God to help it feel better. And it means that I throw a bit of Education into our day when I answer my daughter's question about why dogs shake their bodies (actually I never did come up with that answer).
As moms, there are things that we do--some without even thinking--that we won't have to do again tomorrow. But enough about that, I have to go do the dishes.
13 comments:
Your blog is very interesting.
Kisses
So... two guest entries in a row. When can we be expecting the start of another Community member's blog?
Michaela,
As soon as I get my computer out of the shop,I think I will enter the blogger world. Amber is going to help me set it up. I'll let you know.
It's funny. I try to do what Christine says, to "sprinkle God" on daily activities. But I have become so hyper sensitive to using Christianize with adults, that I even feel funny using it with Sage. For example, I know that God is with her, and I know that she doesn't need to be afraid of the dark (although I am extremely afraid of the dark), and that she can trust God. But I really have to force myself to tell her not to be afraid of the dark, because she's not alone, and God is with her. I wonder how much Christianize is appropriate for children. And how much is appropriate for other followers of Jesus.
I think we have to realize how we learned as kids ... it wasn't by discussing the many gray issues of Christianity -- it was by hearing the core truths firsts (Jesus loves me this I know ...) and then working all of the other stuff out later when our minds mature and we start really thinking for ourselves. That's just my take, anyway
Occasionally, they do notice though...One day when Ben was going to work, Caleb asked if Mommy was going to work and Emma answered, "No, Caleb, Mommy stays home and works everyday."
P.S. My take on "Christianize" is that it is yet another thing we adults have complicated...we think "God is always with you" is complex, and has so much behind it, so many implications...kids take it at face value, on faith. God IS with me all the time. And as they get a bit older, I just let God's Word speak for itself. We read the NLT, and Emma and Caleb are learning, "The Lord is my shepherd. I have everything I need." Psalm 23:1 If God is real and active and alive in our life, then I think He will be in theirs too. I hope to be honest about my fears and struggles, so they can see me taking them to my Lord, and yes, saying sorry even to them when I have acted in a way that does not please God.
I don't think what I am doing with my girls is "Christianeze" at all. And even if it is, who cares. My girls need to hear about God from me and their daddy, because they aren't going to hear much about God outside the home. It is my God-given responsibility to teach them about their Creator. And it's not forced, as my article indicated. It's very natural, and that is why I don't think of it as Christianeze. I agree with Hestermom in that we have complicated things too much.
Great take on it Lisa.
Just to clarify:
I don't think that it is wrong at all to "sprinkle God" on our kids and their lives. I was just expressing that when I do talk with Sage, (and now Aspen too) about "God truths," I'm struck by how different I talk with them than with other adults.
With regards to "Christianize." I think that I mostly mean, providing pat answers to complex situations. Perhaps this is perfectly normal and beneficial for a three year old. But I know some adults who talk the same way to other adults. Christine, I 100% agree with showing children where God is at work around them, and how He relates with them. That's our job as parents. You are right, it is our ordained task.
P.S. again...Ryan, I also meant to say that I agree with you, sometimes it is so much easier to give our "learned" response to certain questions, rather than a heartfelt, truthful answer...That's why three year olds are the perfect practice ground for evangelism, outreach and ministry...they follow every answer you give with, "Why?" And you better be able to give an answer, however, every once in a while, it all comes down to faith.
Ryan, I agree with you about the struggle to give just pat answers to complex questions. It's funny that you mentioned that because today Amber Shea & I saw and chatted with Chris B., a physically/somewhat mentally disabled young man tooling across the gas station parking lot in his wheelchair. As I later explained to Amber Shea why God made Chris without the ability to walk, I definitely didn't use pat answers. What I told her I would probably tell an adult. I think we instinctively know when to give a pat answer and when a pat answer would do the subject injustice. Does that make sense? Still, I agree with you that it is a struggle.
By the way, I hope I didn't come on too strong with my reply to you yesterday. This blog thing is way cool!
Great article Christine, Thanks for sharing with us. This task of parenthood is amazing isn't it? Each child learns differently and comes up with new questions to stump me and to bring me joy. From Drew's quesition, "Mom, are you the smartest person in the world?", to Joe's question, "Mom, how do they make fans?". I am tempted to answer yes to the first and have to answer I don't know to the last. But the spritual ones are the hardest because they matter the most. The fact these little erternal souls have been intrusted to us for a time. And the time will be so much shorter than we realize on some of those long days. You are right Christine that they need to hear about God from us. We can't trust that job to anyone else. I think I'm going to go pray for/with my kids again...
:)
What a wonderful Idea to have a guest on the blog.....
I sing Hymns to Peter, and He has heard the Lord's prayer every night of his life (not patting my back here.) We says prayers of thanksgiving before every meal and he began holding my hand upon saying that prayer about three months ago. Boy was that a miracle to see.
I have thought about what he is seeing in my pilgramage and he is seeing a sinner saved by grace. He has already overheard many arguments between his mommy and daddy and I always think to myself "how awful"....but he also sees us say we are sorry and kiss and hug and give and accept forgiveness too.
This parenting thing is very a very sacred burden and elizabeth elliot has said.
Amen
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